Tuesday 9 June 2009

A to Zzzzzzz

Serious post alert.

In fact these are the posts I wanted to do but felt that ensuing judgment would be too harsh, but i haven't slept at all tonight so f**k you.

I can hear the birds songs. I can hear the world around me coming to life. The beautiful sunrise piercing through the curtains like a warm dagger that signals what I had feared. I'm not going to sleep tonight. I try desperately to free my brain of the unnecessary thoughts but every time my head comes to rest the wheel begins to spin again. The redundant feeling of quitting the attempts to sleep is actually rather comforting as you know that even though you will feel terrible the whole of the next day, you don't have to try anymore.

It was at this moment, it clicked that this is what I want to do. This is me. This is who I am. I want to write. And i shall. For who and what are questions that can be answered later. But for one short moment there was clarity born from complete and utter frustration.

This whole post is completely insomnia induced and for all I know could be complete rubbish. However, right now, deluded or not, it makes sense. I don't know whether I'm alone in this revelation or whether others understand. I hope that others do find a sense of satisfaction in believing in their calling and their natural ability.

:D

TO

3 comments:

  1. I've had odd little moments of clarity like this...
    like the moment i realised i should be vegetarian.
    Or the moment i realised i needed to travel the world.

    I think it's moments like that, that make who you are. I reckon it's almost as if you're tapping into another realm of consciousness if only for a split second. Listen to what your mind is telling you. If it's telling you to write, then you should write.

    I've always listened to my mind when it's told me things like that, and when i've listened to it, i have not regretted it in the slightest!

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  2. continuing my chistain bale theme
    the machinist is a quailty film
    and he suffers from insomnia and goes ccccrazy

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  3. I was going to reference the film...i only eat around once a day like he does in the film (and in preparation for the film)....Maybe i could do a hollywood remake!?

    TO

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