Honesty and Integrity

There is nothing better than having a gut instinct and finding out you were right.

It can be about anything but it seems to be even better when its about people. Probably because we (most humans :S) spend so much time interacting with others.

Those moments when something clicks and you realise how good a friend someone actually is is remarkable, similarly when you realise someone you've always thought was shady finally shows their true colours.

It's strange, I have a friend who I have for a long time regarded as a very close friend. However, like many people in this world, they are very different in groups as to when we are one-on-one. Again, like most of these kind of people, they are a lot nicer and friendly towards me when we are doing something without a large group as he finds the need to project their humour (which is mostly the 'insult someone' kind) toward me. I found I picked up this trait, much to the annoyance of other groups and even some of my best friends. Don't worry, I have slowly been extracting it from my demeanor.

It's even stranger that when I question their level of friendship I find myself conflicted. Half the time I think of them as a best friend, the other half its like they wouldn't care if they never saw me again and slightly two faced.

Who knows? Because I don't. They often mock me for my humility and emotionality...is this because they wish they could be so too or because they like to take the piss? They are often supportive and negative in equal parts so to ensure I remain confused about what they actually think.

Simply put, I can't work out whether i'm over-thinking (the sociology student in me says this isn't possible) the whole situation or whether they are the deepest person I know in terms of the fact they are repressing a lot through jokes and emotional retardation.

:/

TO